To Those Still Following Me:
First, let me start by telling you that I appreciate the fact that you are still there. I honestly do not understand why you’re still there. I mean that, sincerely.
I am well aware that I am an acquired taste. I write with a style that can easily appear as arrogant and condescending. I’m also wordy, which can be tedious and boring. I am impatient with people who are willfully ignorant, or who don’t even try to think for themselves, and I am hostile toward those who are purposefully obtuse or refuse to acknowledge the dictates of sound reasoning. Finally, I lack tact. I much prefer stating what I mean in a simple, open and honest manner. I never mean any insult or offense. I just think that facts — even if the fact is of our personal opinion — should be stated plainly and left to stand for themselves. Unfortunately, many people are put off by this. I believe they see it as aggressive or offensive, but I honestly don’t know. All I know for sure is that, when taken together, I am not the most lovable of characters, which is why I am constantly amazed that any of you actually want to read what I have to say. So, again, thank you.
The next order of business is to address my personal struggles. If you follow me, then I trust you are aware that I have been largely silent since the Presidential inauguration. This was intentional. Think of it as a method of self-preservation. I not only stopped blogging, I turned off nearly all news and talk radio. I even cut back on my consumption of social media, and restricted the social media I was consuming to family and hobbies. I did this because I needed a break from the insanity that is spreading throughout this world. However, while I have been hiding from the world, I have not been idle. I have been using this time to re-evaluate my life: who was the person I once wanted to be, and who is the person I have become. It has lead to something of a personal crisis, as I do not like the person I have become. Thankfully, that is something I can and intend to change, and this post is the start of that process.
Part of my examination of my life dealt with my blogging; specifically, why do I blog? And, more importantly, what good does my blogging do? When I started out, I blogged to stroke my own ego — and I know it. I’m not proud of this fact, but, never-the-less, it’s the truth and, as I said a moment ago, I prefer to just state the truth plainly and let it stand for what it is: the truth. However, I have changed since I started blogging. Part of that change has come as a result of what I’ve learned about the history of this world, but the majority of my changes are the result of embracing my faith. One cannot commit to living according tot he teachings of Scripture and remain the same. Committing to those teachings will change you, and one of the biggest changes is that it will humble you. A growing sense of humility has lead to a growing sense of doubt; doubt about a great many things. Where I was once convinced that I knew the truth about a great many things, now I am uncertain as to whether or not I know the truth about anything. This doubt includes my blogging.
Ever since I stopped blogging, I have been struggling with the decision of whether or not to continue my efforts. Part of me is tired, and wants to quit. It actually takes a great deal of time and energy to maintain a blog, especially if you want it to be of value to others. And, honestly, it also costs a bit of money, more so if you want to keep it free of outside advertising. Well, I have three blog pages, so… I have also been feeling a little sorry for myself, as well as frustrated and angry. I have tried for two decades to make a difference by sharing what I have learned with whoever would listen, but I can’t see where it has made any difference. Most people refuse to read everything I write, let alone follow up on the material I present to support my posts. Frankly, after twenty years, it feels like I have been wasting my time. However, as I said, I have been trying to fully embrace my faith, and my faith teaches me that my life is of less importance than the lives of others. If I want to serve YHWH, then I will not focus on my desires, I will focus on serving my fellow man. That brings me to those of you who still follow my blogging.
Once again, I have no idea why you follow me, or what you find valuable in the things I write. This isn’t false humility; I mean it. I do not understand how or why you can find value in my work when I, myself, question its value. But that doesn’t matter. That is me worrying about me, and not you. What matters is that many of you do find value in what I do and it is for that reason that I have decided to continue blogging. It doesn’t matter what I think, or whether or not I get anything from my efforts. All that matters is what others get out of it. That is how I serve YHWH: by serving others. This means, if I my blogging serves just one of you — in any way — then I am doing what I am supposed to do. I am being obedient to the Lord. Scripture teaches that this should be enough for me, and I am working to train myself to be content with such things. So, I am going to resume my blogging as of today. However, there will be some changes.
As I mentioned, I have three blog pages. Originally, I did this so that I could write for those who wanted to focus on specific areas of interest. One page was for anything related to Scripture, the other for the principles of Natural Law and Liberty and the third was to discuss current events from a ‘Christian’ perspective. Well, I made a mess of things, and I did so because I was trying to work according to a worldly view and not a Scriptural view. In short, I separated things that should not and cannot be separated simply because I didn’t want to offend people who might not agree with my faith. Before I resume my blogging, this needs to change. So, going forward, I will be re-purposing my three blog pages. I will still use them to discuss different subjects, but I will no longer treat those subjects as separate. I will not only discuss the connections between these three areas, I will be extensively cross-linking all three blogs. The idea is to teach by sharing why I believe what I believe in a way that will make sense to as many of you as possible. My idea is to do this by presenting things in small packages that are easier to digest. Then, cross-linking those smaller packages so that you can work through the larger ideas at your own pace. I thought about this a great deal, and it is the best way I can think of to present everything that runs through my mind. I just hope it works for you.
The following is a list of links to my three blog pages and a description of what I will be focusing on in each of them. If you do not already do so, I urge you to sign up to follow each of these three blogs. This is because I will not always cross-link everything that is posted on each one, but all the information posted on each blog is still connected to the information on the other two. I still have a lot of work to do to the look and function of the blogs. This will take time. I have managed to add the Forum to On the Road to Damascus, and I still intend to add podcasts and, if the Lord wills it, even videos to my blogging. If I am lucky, we might eventually have a daily live-stream show where you can even call in and join the discussion. But, for now, I have this:
The OYL: Going forward, this blog page will deal with matters of Faith. It will focus on Biblical Scripture, but it will also address faith, in general, as well as comparative religions and their core beliefs.
The Road to Concord: Going forward, this blog page will deal with matters of Reason and Critical Thinking. This will include a great deal, to include Logic, Natural Law, Science, History and Scriptural Apologetics.
On the Road to Damascus: Going forward, this blog page will deal with matters of philosophy: specifically, how one should conceive of, understand and live in this world from a Scriptural world view.
3 thoughts on “Time for a Change”
Glad your are back! My thoughts about one paragraph, “It doesn’t matter what I think, or whether or not I get anything from my efforts. All that matters is what others get out of it. That is how I serve YHWH: by serving others. This means, if I my blogging serves just one of you — in any way — then I am doing what I am supposed to do. I am being obedient to the Lord. Scripture teaches that this should be enough for me, and I am working to train myself to be content with such things. So, I am going to resume my blogging as of today.” I think it does matter what you think and if you get anything from your efforts. Doing God’s work, being obedient to the Lord, also means personal growth for you. Joy from from your efforts of serving the Lord. If there is no joy in this for you, then is it truly your path to serve God? Maybe your path lies elsewhere. It seems you have been consumed by these doubts of blogging for a long time, weighing on your conscience, ruminating, rethinking, recycling ways to make the endeavor more true to service the Lord. Maybe it’s as simple as doing what you are gifted and love to do, whatever that is, to serve others and to serve the Lord. Just a thought from someone who has watched you struggle with this for some time.
Thank you for your feedback, Michele. It means a lot. There is wisdom in the council of many, because it helps us to consider things from many different positions. To be honest, I struggled — in part — because I wasn’t sure if this is the path I’m meant to be on or not. Not because I don’t enjoy writing, but more because I have become very fearful of leading people astray. I enjoy teaching, but only if and when I know I am teaching correctly. This is part of why I plan to change the way I write. I am going to try to take on less of a teaching tone and more of a conversational tone: like a friend sharing their thoughts on the day, or about the topic at hand (hopefully that makes sense). Either way, the pressure to start writing again has been growing, so I believe I’m on the right track. 🙂
I believe Divine guidance will keep you from leading people astray because your heart is in the right place. It takes two to be lead astray. The audience also has a responsibility to use critical thinking when learning. Looking forward to your new endeavors.